Spreading myself too thin ~

I was thinking of the fact I've been unable to write here, and how that's okay bla bla.

I thought of what's making me feel unable to write, since nothing has basically changed. Then I realized how my experiences with others and what their realities are is happening with me on a subconscious level ~ we're stressing because "we" (each relative and individual group in our sphere of influence) are seeing and hearing the big pinch (droughts, gas prices, food, animal feed such as hay . .). Seeing no way to avoid the sacrifices and priorities we'll be forced to choose between ~ this does rattle ones' spirit.

My advice seems cheep, but it's the only thing that's gonna get you through if ya don't believe there's a power greater than any of us here on an individual level. And that is to just keep breathing deeper (because you've got to be conscious of it too), stay level headed like the young man I last wrote about, realize your priorities, unconditional love at the least, and it'll probably get ya through.

But if ya want strength in numbers, so to speak, have FAITH. This was learned by me over the last 23 years. There is something unfathomably brilliant that organizes the mechanics of what goes on ~ on a scale so infinite. I'm not going to blow my mind trying to intellectualize it. I'm following my heart. I can only do what I ("me", the individual like none other) can do! That's it folks. If you're driven to do more than someone else, then just do it, be grateful you can, do everything for the better of everything. What goes around comes around somehow. Sometimes we see it and that's cool. Other times it's a mystery, but it always works out somehow that something'll come around either way.

Gee, now, ain't that a mystery ~ I'm being sarcastic and I know sarcasm never helps. Hey, but I write like me. The day (23+ years ago) that I was forced (by my life literally being saved by my 3 & 5 year old kids after a severe motor accident) to finally have an open mind to the possibility of a power greater than I could comprehend.

Yesterday I realized I too needed to "regroup my self" for what's ahead. People, we've got to start having FAITH, because we're not here to worry about our survival. We just start taking baby steps, deeper breaths, it's okay to need to focus on thoughts knowing you're doing all you can, life's gonna force us to realize priorities, letting go of OUR "patterns" (as simple as keeping plants, things alive for whatever our reasons) and finding out that yes, just that attitude change, enabled us to "see" deeper and it's all okay. So I'd say I'm basically surrendering my will to have fear, hold onto priorities or friends or whatever that can be let go of, know we're doing our best because we can, and live the reality with faith how things always work out. If it ain't in our lifetime, so be it. At least I'll know where my heart is.

~ Surrendering our fears, worries, uncertainties of the government, our world, health to a degree, bla bla is critical ~ because we alone can't change these things. It's too unfathomable for our minds. Yet amazingly our deepest heart is US at the core and it's got abilities the human mind has basically infantile knowledge about.

Well I got a busy, strenuous 6+ hours ahead of me today. It's the 31st day this month, so more folks will be in to eat at a church's generous and most gracious serving of hot food' take out bag lunch and cloths to choose from on Friday. And I wash dishes and be a "go-fer" for the great folks I volunteer with. And not everyone is over 60 or even 20 or 20 for that matter, which is a breath of fresh air to see.

Hey, and it's a "blue moon" this evening. The second full moon rises when our sun sets this evening, so it's called a blue moon. It happens every 3 or 4 years. But I guess we wouldn't know if someone hadn't created calendars. And calendars, timers, sticky notes, 1 physical notebook instead of 30+ notes all over frying my mind with all there is to do, hooks for everything important bla bla are the essentials to keep my survival flowing with peace (starting inner and becoming more and more outer as awareness into our life's mechanics opens our heart wider and wider).

Man, I'm soundin' like some preacher. Yea, I'm outstanding in my own field. That's the joke, outstanding is one word not two. Oh my goodness, I just realized, like Mee, that the feelings behind knowing outstanding basically means superior or excellent (this unfathomable power to work the mechanics of life, let alone create it) versus a person like a farmer out alone creating whatever in his field.

Anyway, time to move one. Fare well and a hui ho, LL