Oh man, I'm humbled again ~

Where to begin . . well at the beginning LL. I read my "morning paper" written by my long lost cuz : http://checkingmymotives.blogspot.com/ ~ Thanks JJ ~

I want to shed tears, but my tears would be filled with joyful salt. I can only keep on keepin' on without tears. But anyway.

I upset two of the most essential ingredients in my progressive healing: my daughter (on her first full day home from the hospital with their newborn son) and my articulate (thank goodness or she may never have been able to say it otherwise) cousin.

I continue to have a commanding personality that hurts the ones I love and love me. I thought I said something with pure love to my daughter, but found out how it sounds ~ which life has been showing me, but I haven't gotten it til I'm ready I guess. Then only days later, I absolutely offend, because I didn't first put myself in my cousin's shoes long enough to realize how self-centered and commanding I sounded. Oh my goodness, I was humbled again, but this may mean I'm nearing the end of my lessons in awareness on this issue. But honestly, it's really up to me now to carry this awareness to my nature. BIG job.

I call it a SLAP in the face. I realize my errors more quickly and easily when I'm silent, love myself, accept, and have patience (S.L.A.P.). I am constantly adjusting and modifying my behavior until my "innocent" words (no longer my actions) don't offend or hurt someone-else.

And as JJ says in her blog http://checkingmymotives.blogspot.com/ she keeps on doin' the best she can and things do eventually work out. And the more we learn and practice the quicker things do work out. ~ I believe because we've created the right emotional environment for the highest good for everyone to germinate to it's potential.

See ~ and then why clutter our mind with worry about things you can't control or do anything about because we've got enough just puttin' awarenesses into practice, and that means our control over our own heart/mind ~

JJ's gratitude list from Thursday 8/9/12 ~ http://checkingmymotives.blogspot.com/

I have God in my life - running my life*
I am healthy
I have kids that are healthy and reasonably happy
My ex is no longer angry with all that happened.
I am employed
I can pay (and do) my bills
I'm no longer afraid of the mailbox (don't laugh)
I have all the essentials and then some
I paid my car off
I have freedom like I've never known.
I actually want to get up at 4am and go to the gym.

Mine from today, 8/11/12
I have a great awareness of "God" in my life and the power of this "higher entity"
I am healthy
I have kids that are reasonably healthy and happy
I can only pray my eXes no longer hurt by what happened "so long" ago
I am volunteering my free time washing dishes and doing barn work I LOVE
I can pay (and do) my bills
I'm no longer "afraid" to answer the phone
I have all the essentials (a roof over my head, food in my stomach, and healthcare)
My children live close, yet we're becoming closer with time
I have great friends surrounding me if/when I choose
And I too get up at 4 am-ish to start my day, and I love it

I know, as adults, we've each created the foundation we live on and when our awareness knows we've got at least a roof and food (to some degree) to be grateful for, we've got a huge beginning (damn, the healthcare situation screws SO many and my heart feels your frustrations). I can only pray everyone has some kind of family! And when we're missing something on the list, we need to still be grateful it ain't any worse!

That may sound easy for me to say, yet I know too many folks (me included to a great degree) who have risen from absolutely none or far less from the above lists and risen with grace, love, and awareness worth all the gold on earth.

Whoa, I'm putting the reins on for today. Fare well and a hui ho, LL

P.S. (guess it's only you JJ :) I want to clarify the * I put on the list from your blog done on Thurs the 9th. But I want to do it for cyberspace cuz it is my truth on "God", but I don't want to offend especially you (because our God belief is a shadow away). See ya on the path!